He took a breath and made himself relax again. He wanted to apologize, but didn't want to make Hijikata think he didn't want this, either. He wanted to move forward instead of dwelling on what he couldn't fix about himself.

He let the hand that had been on Hijikata's shoulder slide downward, fingertips mapping the contours of skin and muscle and bone until he comes to the scar on his upper arm. That, he traces with the pad of his thumb, as though he could erase that mistake.